Bedtime Stories Illuminate Childhood Aspirations and Crush Parental Ones

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Some of these career choices may be a bit dated (what with cars driving themselves these days and carpentry being outsourced to Sweden/Ikea). Bravo to Richard Scary for not kowtowing to the cultural norm of the day and asking the reader if they want to be a good cook, like their father.

Last night I was reading the great Richard Scary classic, “Best Word Book Ever” or something about words, I can’t remember. It’s really long and there are surprisingly few words in it. When I flipped to the page about professions, I asked the logical question, “What do you want to be when you grow up?” I may or may not have blocked everything on the page from her line of sight except the doctor/pig and may or may not have lead her a bit with, “…a doctor?” To which she (exasperated) responded, “ewwwwww, no daddy, I’m going to be a Princess when I grow up!”

I followed up with, “Are you sure you don’t want to help people when they’re sick or injured or do something else for work besides be a Princess?” To which she responded dryly, “I don’t want to work when I grow up, it’s boring.”

I don’t think behavior at this age is any arbiter of future work ethic. I was a really lazy kid too, and … yikes.

Now, don’t get me wrong, I think she might have a real shot at Princessdom and am considering a move to the other side of the pond to explore a relationship between her and the royal baby if Kate Middleton would only reply to one of my text messages. That being said, I don’t like to put ALL my eggs in one basket unless I’m betting on the Kentucky Derby (Thanks, I’ll Have Another, 2012 Winner!) or trying to win Woodland Park Zoo’s annual Easter Egg Hunt. So to hedge this bet a bit, it might make sense for her to pursue a more sensible (yet less lucrative) career than Princess, like Doctor or Derivatives Trader. I’m really hoping she’s gonna be better at math and science than her old man, or those pursuits could pose a problem.

If she wants to become a Princess when she grows up, who am I to tell her it’s impossible? That she’ll have a better shot at being the first woman in the NBA.

I’ve always said that my child is more talented than anyone else’s, so what’s stopping her from following her dream and becoming a Princess? Her best bet is probably somewhere in Central Asia. I’m thinking a ~stan, (eg. Turkmenistan), where all women are treated like Princesses!

She does have a bit of a princess obsession and is really glomming on to her gender stereotypes. She wants to get married. She loves Barbie. Her favorite colors are pink, purple, and sparkly (so I made it the theme of her birthday party). Recently, when I asked her what she wanted to be for the Halloween that’s coming up, she answered, “either a princess or married.” I’m sure this is just a phase, and by the time she’s a teenager she will love MMA and paintball and camo.

Another brilliant Daddy Idea, in fitting with her birthday theme of Pink, Purple, and Sparkly -- Glitter art project (what I later learned is referred to as the Herpes of the craft world).

Another brilliant World’s Best Daddy (TM) idea; in fitting with her birthday theme, Pink, Purple, and Sparkly — glitter art project! I later learned why glitter is referred to as the herpes of the craft world. You really can’t get rid of it!

AT and I are members of Seattle’s great Woodland Park Zoo and every year they have an Easter Egg Hunt – or Kidmaggedon as I like to call it. As you can see in lower right hand corner of the video, I absolutely shredded those kids in coming away with the most eggs. I’ve never felt like more of a winner.

2012 was the first year I ever watched the Kentucky Derby. I was in Chicago for work and met up with some friends and we all placed a wager on I’ll Have Another. A larger wager than I usually make and as you can see it was an exciting race!

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2 thoughts on “Bedtime Stories Illuminate Childhood Aspirations and Crush Parental Ones

  1. Hi Jamie! Really fun post—-laughed out loud! Seems pretty clear that she should
    apply REALLY Early Decision to Prince-ton. xxxxx

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